So there was a lot of misinformation, and just a huge lack of the nitty gritty stuff, when I was in school and I see a lot of young kids on forums asking if something is normal or worrying about stuff and adults who have wondered their whole lives if other people feel the same on their periods.
Here’s some stuff about periods people might not talk about;
- It can smell. But using scented pads isn’t a great idea, the chemicals in the perfume cause irritation. But here’s the thing; vaginas smell. All of them. All the time. Right now. YOU notice the smell because it’s literally part of you, but other people don’t. If it’s a foul smell and very strong you should speak with a gynecologist, but the average day-to-day odor is normal and doesn’t mean you’re dirty.
- Diarrhea all day every day.
- Or, alternately, constipation all day every day.
- ALSO alternatively, a healthy mix of both sprinkled randomly across the days of your period like too much nutmeg where no one asked nutmeg to be.
- Your first period might not look like a period at first. It might look, well, brown, and lead you to other conclusions about what’s going on in your skivvies. Then it might not come again the next month and show up on a totally different week when it does. Mine came like A LOT. It was very heavy and I bled through a pair of jeans in the middle of school it was so heavy. I didn’t know what it was and thought I was bleeding from my butt because my liar teacher said a period would only be a ‘tablespoon’. Tablespoon of lies.
- At some point your probably going to stain the back of the toilet seat with blood. That doesn’t mean your bleeding too much, or that your dirty, but it’s a tid bit of information I wish I knew as a kid so I could have known to look for it when using public restrooms or at friend’s houses.
- Period farts.
- Having sex on your period isn’t gross or dirty or wrong. Put an old towel down on the bed and have at it.
- The feelings you have on your period are entirely valid and not imagined or unimportant because of your period. Whether or not your feelings are heightened by PMS they are still your feelings and should be respected.
- The ‘average’ period is anywhere from 3-10 days with any variation in flow. You shouldn’t be concerned because your period isn’t the same as your friends is, only if it changes from what’s average for you. There isn’t such a thing as a ‘normal period’ you need to fit into.
- If you wear a disposable pad there will be a point where it’s going to unstick at some corner and when you pull it off it’s going to pull some of your pubic hair with it. This is going to suck. I am very sorry.
- If you wear a tampon there is going to be a point you will squeeze it out of yourself when you use the bathroom. Just change your tampon each time you go. Please listen to me on this.
- Swamp butt.
- You will get blood stained thighs at some point. It’s going to cake onto your skin and make a mess just everywhere.
- The cashier doesn’t care about you buying pads/tampons/etc, they just had a guy buy 4 pounds of carrots, a box of Xtra Large ribbed condoms and cherry scented lube. Your pads are not on their radar of things to care about.
Washing Your Junk:
- When you shower (if you want a bath i’d shower before hand or dont wash in the bath itself and shower after to get clean) remember you are not actually washing inside of your vagina, you’re washing the skin around it (labia, clitoris, all those good bits). Using a soft wash cloth with either very mild unscented soap or just warm water. Seriously, stop putting washing products inside yourself; You do not need to wash the inside of your vagina and doing so can cause infections. Unless given products by your doctor there is no need to douche or use creams or wipes or other stuff like that. They’re lies sold to you to make you think you smell bad.
- You know how your parents said ‘wipe front to back’?Same with washing, you don’t want to drag butt germs all over your vagina. Don’t do it.
- Some people find that trimming, or shaving, their pubic hair helps them control odor, or makes wearing sanitary products more comfortable, but it isn’t required and is personal preference with different individuals. There is no health benefit to shaving or trimming your pubic hair and it will not make you cleaner than if you didn’t shave.
- Wearing light breathable cotton undies during your period will help eliminate odor and not give you swamp butt. Especially in the summer.
- Washing after sex is a great idea and not just because it’s romantic. If you’ve ever had period sex before you will k n o w but if you have not I am going to just ask you to take my word for it and plan a shower afterwards.
Feel free to tack on other stuff if you want. Tell me all your period secrets.
Also: keep in mind that what’s coming out isn’t just blood. It’s also uterine lining. It’s not going to smell like blood and it’s common, especially when it’s heavy, that there will be clots and chunks. These are normal.
You should NOT be experiencing debilitating pain. Cramping, bloating, and general discomfort are expected but shouldn’t be severe. If your period is causing you nausea or vomiting, dizziness, fainting spells, blacking out, or any other severe symptoms that interfere with your day to day life PLEASE reach out to a doctor.
I think @rattlecat made an awesome post about Always infinity pads being way better than regular pads for anyone that suffers heavy flows or prefers pads to other period methods
Pads have the curse of feeling like you are wearing a diaper so this may help people that cannot use anything but pads
(I’m on mobile or I’d find it and link directly. Sorry!)
I am a fan of ‘U by Kotex’ and the ever famous Always Infinity, both of which are often on the cheaper end of the price range and frequently on sale. I have never had an issue bleeding through either and even during times I’ve been unable to change them for way too long (dont judge me it was a road trip) the pad stayed in place the whole time.
On a side note, you can find free samples from just about any pad/tampon company website. I got a pad, tampon, and panty liner trial pack (all in one pack!) from Kotex that I keep in the glove box.
If you’re one of the people that needs to reach out to a doctor, be warned that they may not believe you, especially if you’re under 20. (The number of times I’ve been told I’m overreacting or that it’s normal for things to be “weird” in the first few years of periods or that I’m making stuff up is alarmingly high – I still don’t know what’s going on because of it, and I’ve been trying for years.) Be prepared to fight for it. Find a gynecologist if your default doctor won’t listen to you. Just find out what’s going on and do what you need to to help improve things.
I want to put it out there for young people who may not be used to making their own doctor appointments; you do not need to be referred by your primary physician to make an appointment with a specialist like a gynecologist. You don’t need to do anything other than make the appointment, your primary doesn’t have to be part of that process if you don’t trust them or they aren’t helping you.
If you _don’t_ get your period regularly, or if you get it 4-6 times a year only, see a doctor – you may have an endocrin disorder. Also you can try period panties or menstrual cups – find a solution that works for you!
Adding to this because I nearly died: If you go a long time without having a period, say like, 6 months, IMMEDIATELY go see a doctor. If the lining of your uterus doesn’t shed and just sits there, it cause be a precursor for uterine cancer. Everybody thinks that going to see a OBGYN is super icky and gross but you know what, it literally saved my life.
And my OBGYN, after letting me tell my story and freaking out, said, “okay, this may seem like it’s weird to you, but I literally see this every day.”
Also, if you have any of the above problems, especially pain, and your doctor tries to dismiss them as “lady troubles” and tells you to take paracetomol or painkillers and deal with it, don’t let them overrule and dismiss you you. If it’s that bad, kick up a fuss and make them listen. Take a list of symptoms. Keep a diary of incidents. Make sure they know exactly how bad it is and when. Make it so they won’t try and dismiss it as just period pain.
This may or may not be helpful, but I’m going to write it anyway. More about period sex.:
1. I have heard that “the flow” can slow down if your aroused, and in my experience this seems to have some accuracy (there will probably still be some blood though, put down a towel and all parties should wash after)
2. In my experience, during ones period ones clit and vulva and vagina may be much more sensitive. That could be really nice or really not nice
3. Period sex can help with cramps, a lot
4. It could be really uncomfortable if you are constipated
5. Seriously, put down a towel, or something.
On cramps:
1. See number 3 above
2. Tylenol and ibprofen
3. There are period yoga videos on youtube, which can be very nice (there’s one where it just tells you to lay down like you are doing sit ups) (FYI there might be a lot more flow while you do this)
4. You can make a heating pad. Look it up
5. Walk and move, it could help. Or exercise (like in number three)
and finally: If you want to lay on the couch and watch sappy movies (I like watching really crappy Sci-Fi movies, Dune was boring thoug), and eat chocolate and junk food, and possbily cry. It happens, no shame in it. Oh also please drink lots of tea and water. There is PMS tea which tastes like cinnamon and that can be nice -possibly cinnamon helps in general, I don’t remember, but don’t just eat cinnamon.
**if you eat cinnamon you will wish you had not, a lot.
PS I tried to keep this gender neutral, I’m sorry if I failed. OK BYE. *smile face*
If you’re autistic, be ready for the changes in hormones to have a ton of effects on you.
Dyspraxia may get worse or seem better.
Proprioception may disappear or seem too intense.
You may notice increased aggression in yourself.
It may take less stimulation than usual to send you into a meltdown or shutdown.
If you’re hypersensitive, everything is too loud, big and close.
If you’re hyposensitive, nothing will be big, loud or close enough.
Thinking patterns may get convoluted.
You might experience extreme hyperfocus or find yourself unable to focus.
Everyday tasks you do a lot may seem harder or easier.
You might notice more self-injurious behaviors (SIB) in yourself if you have those behaviors. Some people may only get SIB during menstruation.
If you’re verbal, you may find it harder to speak clearly or go nonverbal a lot. Keeping your thoughts together to talk can also seem harder.
If you’re nonverbal you may find your other forms of communication are more difficult or they may get easier.
For everyone: The armpit sweat that feels like slime…‘nuff said!
You might sweat way more easily than usual.
Hot flashes happen, too, as well as increased reactions to temperature changes.
Your appetite may increase. Menstruating burns calories and your body is telling you to replace them. I think that’s mainly why people get food cravings during menstruation.
If you have a connective tissue disorder your joints will most likely become more unstable in the 5 days leading up to your cycle and the few days afterwards. This is because your body has produced more progesterone and that hormone loosens up our joints. People without a CTD may experience joint laxity at this point in their cycle, but ours is far more pronounced because of our already lax connective tissues.
Expect more frequent subluxations and dislocations at this point in your cycle. There’s not much you can do to prevent it beyond taking extra care and maybe using tape or bracing. Most doctors won’t mention this either when you’re first diagnosed with a CTD, mine never did.
Some really good stuff here for period havers. I apologize if any of the comments were cis-sexist, I tried to cut off any reblogs that got blatant, but I still don’t always recognize it when I see it.