I wrote a big long post explaining my latest mopey streak but then deleted it because… it was really long. Short version:

• May is hard because my dad died five years ago on May 26th. It sucked. It still sucks. But things are slowly getting better.
• I’m all sorts of worked up about my health because I gained more weight for no apparent reason, and it’s freaking me out even though I know it’s part of the monthly cycle and will be gone in a few days, just like that.
• High stress, high paranoia, high ANGER levels. GAB SMASH, then curl up on the couch and cry because she is FOREVER ALONE. 
• New doctor next week. I’m afraid he’ll be a jerk like other doctor’s I’ve had, but if I can just get him to find me a lymphedema specialist, I’ll be happy. It’d be nice if he gave me more ambien, too. 
• If not I will fight him. Literally. Or verbally. IDK. 

Good things:

• I rejoined weight watchers (online) because I can finally afford it again.
• I’ve started learning Spanish because it bothers me that I can’t help more people that I meet on the train. It’s fun so far, even if my accent is terrible.
• I’m pretty darn excited about San Diego. I have the silly idea of finding a bakery there to make us a (REALLY) tiny wedding cake. There was so much that we wanted to do for our wedding but couldn’t afford to at the time. 

I think that’s it. 

I wrote a big long post explaining my latest mopey streak but then deleted it because… it was really long. Short version:

• May is hard because my dad died five years ago on May 26th. It sucked. It still sucks. But things are slowly getting better.
• I’m all sorts of worked up about my health because I gained more weight for no apparent reason, and it’s freaking me out even though I know it’s part of the monthly cycle and will be gone in a few days, just like that.
• High stress, high paranoia, high ANGER levels. GAB SMASH, then curl up on the couch and cry because she is FOREVER ALONE. 
• New doctor next week. I’m afraid he’ll be a jerk like other doctor’s I’ve had, but if I can just get him to find me a lymphedema specialist, I’ll be happy. It’d be nice if he gave me more ambien, too. 
• If not I will fight him. Literally. Or verbally. IDK. 

Good things:

• I rejoined weight watchers (online) because I can finally afford it again.
• I’ve started learning Spanish because it bothers me that I can’t help more people that I meet on the train. It’s fun so far, even if my accent is terrible.
• I’m pretty darn excited about San Diego. I have the silly idea of finding a bakery there to make us a (REALLY) tiny wedding cake. There was so much that we wanted to do for our wedding but couldn’t afford to at the time. 

I think that’s it.