I had weird dreams last night. Bitter sweet. I got to see my dad again, and he was happy, talking to famous dead musicians about other bands they like. It was so cute and I miss him so much.

And then right after I dreamed about a dinner party where all of the people I’d had a falling out with were there and they’d saved a seat for me? Like… what? Do they not really hate me? Nothing was resolved. I don’t want to eat with those people. But still, it felt so nice to be wanted…

Ugh I just feel really sad and lonely now. Gonna spend the day cleaning….