{"id":4571,"date":"2013-12-29T12:24:36","date_gmt":"2013-12-29T12:24:36","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/archive.gabapple.com\/tumblr\/whiteknighthakuba\/index.php\/2013\/12\/29\/question-008-if-you-give-a-hakuba-a-cookie\/"},"modified":"2013-12-29T12:24:36","modified_gmt":"2013-12-29T12:24:36","slug":"question-008-if-you-give-a-hakuba-a-cookie","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/archive.gabapple.com\/tumblr\/whiteknighthakuba\/index.php\/2013\/12\/29\/question-008-if-you-give-a-hakuba-a-cookie\/","title":{"rendered":"Question 008 (if you give a Hakuba a cookie…)"},"content":{"rendered":"

whiteknighthakuba<\/a>:<\/p>\n

\n

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\"image\"<\/p>\n

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“While undoubtedly delicious, three hundred seems a tad excessive, doesn\u2019t it? I may nip one or two for myself, but if it\u2019s all the same to you, I\u2019d like to share the rest with my followers\u2026 Let\u2019s see, two hundred ninety-eight divided by twenty is\u2026 14.9 cookies per follower.”<\/p>\n

\"image\"<\/p>\n

“That\u2019s still\u2026 quite an unhealthy ratio of cookies per person. But, wait, perhaps if I take an equal share and also send some over to those blokes with the very nice car\u2026\u00a0<\/a>\u00a0That\u2019s three hundred divided by twenty-three, leaving us with 13.043 per person\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

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"No, no, that won\u2019t do at all\u2026 I can\u2019t imagine that anyone should want more than two cookies, but that would mean that I would need one hundred and fifty people to give cookies to\u2026 I suppose I could take them to my father\u2019s office but even that would be excessive and then I would have to worry that my father\u2019s colleagues are assuming that I\u2019m trying to gain additional favor\u2026 and I can\u2019t have that!”<\/p>\n

\"image\"<\/p>\n

“Perhaps one of the upcoming charity events? No\u2026 then I\u2019d have to register them and it would not be coming from a proper catering service which would raise suspicion that we\u2019re cutting budgets\u2026 and if I just left them there discretely, they would suspect that they were poisonous\u2026”<\/p>\n

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“Actually, I don\u2019t know the origin of these cookies in the first place\u2026 How do I know that they are safe for\u00a0anyone\u00a0<\/em>to consume, much less my fans, friends, family, and colleagues?!\u201d
<\/em><\/p>\n

\"image\"<\/p>\n

"\u2026I could always send them to Hattori-san\u2026 but I believe by this point that may be suspect for several different reasons.”<\/p>\n

\"image\"<\/p>\n

“I would just throw them away and be done with it, but I wouldn\u2019t want to be rude. It was awfully considerate of that person to send me cookies in the first place, especially as I do love the occasional treat\u2026"\u00a0<\/p>\n

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"Well! I suppose I ought to get on testing these cookies to ensure their quality and safety. then. It should only take me three or four hours to reach a conclusion.”<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

<\/p>\n

“This would be a much easier problem to solve now… with a little creative cutting, every one of my followers could have approximately one and a half cookies each, not including myself. Alas, those cookies are long since gone, now.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

whiteknighthakuba: “While undoubtedly delicious, three hundred seems a tad excessive, doesn\u2019t it? I may nip one or two for myself, but if it\u2019s all the same to you, I\u2019d like to share the rest with my followers\u2026 Let\u2019s see, two hundred ninety-eight divided by twenty is\u2026 14.9 cookies per follower.” “That\u2019s still\u2026 quite an unhealthy […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[3627,3628,3626],"class_list":["post-4571","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-for-more-reasons","tag-omfg-old-posts-of-amazingness","tag-rabagelled"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/archive.gabapple.com\/tumblr\/whiteknighthakuba\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4571","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/archive.gabapple.com\/tumblr\/whiteknighthakuba\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/archive.gabapple.com\/tumblr\/whiteknighthakuba\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/archive.gabapple.com\/tumblr\/whiteknighthakuba\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/archive.gabapple.com\/tumblr\/whiteknighthakuba\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4571"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/archive.gabapple.com\/tumblr\/whiteknighthakuba\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4571\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/archive.gabapple.com\/tumblr\/whiteknighthakuba\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4571"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/archive.gabapple.com\/tumblr\/whiteknighthakuba\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4571"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/archive.gabapple.com\/tumblr\/whiteknighthakuba\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4571"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}