Re: COOKIES

osakansax said: “Ya know’f ya jus’ give them ta those “blokes with th’ very nice car,” one of them can eat all’f them an’ still have room fer two cakes an’ a 2-liter bottle of rum.”

 

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“Is that so? Well then… I suppose I will bring them by. After all, anyone with such good taste in automobiles would certainly appreciate these cookies which – from what I have seen thus far – ARE safe to eat…”

Question 008 (if you give a Hakuba a cookie…)

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“While undoubtedly delicious, three hundred seems a tad excessive, doesn’t it? I may nip one or two for myself, but if it’s all the same to you, I’d like to share the rest with my followers… Let’s see, two hundred ninety-eight divided by twenty is… 14.9 cookies per follower.”

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“That’s still… quite an unhealthy ratio of cookies per person. But, wait, perhaps if I take an equal share and also send some over to those blokes with the very nice car…  That’s three hundred divided by twenty-three, leaving us with 13.043 per person…”

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“No, no, that won’t do at all… I can’t imagine that anyone should want more than two cookies, but that would mean that I would need one hundred and fifty people to give cookies to… I suppose I could take them to my father’s office but even that would be excessive and then I would have to worry that my father’s colleagues are assuming that I’m trying to gain additional favor… and I can’t have that!”

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“Perhaps one of the upcoming charity events? No… then I’d have to register them and it would not be coming from a proper catering service which would raise suspicion that we’re cutting budgets… and if I just left them there discretely, they would suspect that they were poisonous…”

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“Actually, I don’t know the origin of these cookies in the first place… How do I know that they are safe for anyone to consume, much less my fans, friends, family, and colleagues?!”

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“…I could always send them to Hattori-san… but I believe by this point that may be suspect for several different reasons.”

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“I would just throw them away and be done with it, but I wouldn’t want to be rude. It was awfully considerate of that person to send me cookies in the first place, especially as I do love the occasional treat…" 

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"Well! I suppose I ought to get on testing these cookies to ensure their quality and safety. then. It should only take me three or four hours to reach a conclusion.”

Thunder

phantom-thief-kid:

“If it is so boring, though, I wonder if that’s the true danger. You’ll be fine, if you’ve been to these before, but I may be the first person to die from boredom.” Kaito twitched a bit intentionally, to emphasize his point. “Or maybe it will be much more boring than other ones you’ve been to and we’ll both end up dying from boredom.”

“Let’s hope Detective Mouri doesn’t show up, otherwise someone may end up killing another. There’s rumors that he or that Conan kid that stops KID are cursed.” He was only half joking. The distinct amount of murders those two came across, from what he’d heard, was sincerely starting to make him wonder if one of them pissed off a witch.

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“I would be very surprised if either were invited. While it’s true that Mouri-san is present at these sort of things often enough, it’s usually for him to be a headlining guest. My father has personally chosen you instead, along with the usual high brow crowd. Mouri-san simply doesn’t have the kind of financial backing that they’re after… And as much as I adore Edogawa-kun, it’s likely that there will be an open bar…" 

Hakuba smirked at that. 

"Speaking of, there are ways to stay entertained…” Hakuba said, deciding to not elaborate on that point. “But between my parents’ constant bickering and your magic tricks, I think we’ll all make it through this alive." 

Then he laughed. Soft, genuine, laughter. 

Thunder

phantom-thief-kid:

“…He doesn’t follow that old Holmes adage?” Kaito was trying not to laugh. After all, even though it was improbable, observant people could figure it out. It was just a matter of getting solid evidence to convict him, which he wouldn’t allow if he could help it. And that was a bit of an asinine move on his part, all in all, after just denying he was KID.

“Well, that depends. It wouldn’t be Nakamori that I’d be worried about. But I appreciate your help, nonetheless. Don’t go getting hurt for my sake, though.” It wasn’t like Kaito could get hurt now very easily, so the more worrisome concern was the flock of crows deciding to hurt the bystanders, if they arrived.

“But I’m surprised. Secretly a KID fan?” He let out a chuckle. “I guess that’s a recurring thing, where even the cops usually like him. Go ahead and tell him some hints.”

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“I’ll make sure that he’s properly briefed, and really, I don’t think there’s any cause for worry. The most dangerous part about these charity benefits is how dreadfully boring they are. Trust me. It’s nothing but a bunch of rich men and women dressed up as nicely as they can to show their equally rich friends just how much they belong…" 

Hakuba shook his head, unable to resist rolling his eyes. Despite the fact that he is, indeed, one of those types himself. 

"You’ll be just fine. The law enforcement members that are likely to come are all paper pushers, anyway… bureaucrat-types, making important decisions and speeches. Not easily startled or violent.”

Thunder

phantom-thief-kid:

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“I never knew that. But will it give him anxiety, if he thinks KID has decided to show up? I don’t want to give the guy a heart attack.“ There was some irony to all of this, a sticky web of lies and conflicting interests all centered around the existence of Kaitou KID. And the elephant in the room was bugging him.

“But I wonder… You and I have these banters, where you accuse me of being KID and I deny it. Did you ever tell him about your suspicions? Maybe he’ll leave some priceless gem out, thinking I’d try stealing it, if you did tell him.” His tone was light and joking, but he would behave himself if that were the case. Mostly.

He shifted his head just a bit and stretched his legs. “That’d be pretty low, stealing from a charity event, even if I were KID.”

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“He’d heard that I had pestered you about it… and told me to ‘leave that poor boy alone,’ but I have not discussed any evidence with him. He and I do not go over my cases, typically… the superintendent general does not have time for things like that.” Hakuba shrugged dismissively, looking once again to the floor – and his bare feet sticking out from the blanket. Hm. Not very proper, that. He pulled them back, straightening up on the couch next to Kaito.

“If you’re concerned, I can give him a vague idea of your plan ahead of time. Or, you can discuss it with him yourself… I’m sure he’ll love it, regardless. Honestly, I think he might secretly be a KID fan, himself… and I would be surprised if Nakamori-keibu were to attend… so you should be safe." 

A brief pause.

"I’ll watch out for you.”  

Thunder

phantom-thief-kid:

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“…During the beginning of the show, I was thinking of showing up dressed like Kaitou KID and making it look like the event got crashed, while still doing a trick or two, then revealing it was me instead,” Just hoping that someone other than Hakuba’s dad didn’t try anything.

The arm around him surprised him slightly. Hakuba didn’t really strike him as a touchy type, but it was possible he was mistaken. (He wasn’t a detective, after all.) The thunder boomed outside once more and he saw a fuzzy blur run out from under the couch and ran in the direction of his room. “Are you coming to the event?”

Hakuba wasn’t a touchy person, at least not with people that he knew personally. Truthfully, he wasn’t sure how he felt about having his arm around Kaito, but he left it there and tried to stay calm and casual. The comment on KID earned an amused chuckle, and Hakuba relaxed a little more.

“I don’t think they’ll be expecting that… Should go over quite well. And, yes, I’ll be there.”  Hakuba turned his head to look at Kaito, tilting his chin downward some to see him better. “Even if I weren’t forced to go to all of these events, there’s no way I would miss it. Your performance aside, my father doesn’t take responsibility for these often… that’s my mother’s realm, and she’s threatened to fly out to see how he does for herself. He’s all nerves and anxiety." 

He laughed again, then looked up to the ceiling, stretching his legs out in front of him.

"Papa was such a fan of your father. He’ll be thrilled to hear that you’ve agreed to it."