This is another little side-story for the Epic Conan Fanfic (aka The Call of the Raven, written by Cloverkite and myself). As mentioned before, Kaito and Hakuba’s relationship isn’t the primary focus of the fic, so there are lots of little things like this that we’ve written that are just floating around. This one is one I wrote tonight for Clover (kaitomagic) as a sort of break, which I think was needed for all of us, muns and muses alike. It’s short, it’s sweet, and not the usual style for my DCMK stuff… but hopefully you’ll enjoy the fluff, anyway.

Muse

The days before Pandora were some of the best in my life. Best in our lives.

True, he was gone on the weekends more often than not. He had a lot of things to work out with Kudou-san, and that was understandable. I wasn’t about to get in their way, though I missed him a great deal of the time. But, that said, I was very busy myself. The renewed confidence that I felt in myself really made a difference in the way that I conducted business. With how I treated others, and how others treated me. My agent was floored. I had more interviews booked, and as I did them, I became more comfortable with slipping into my role in Japan. Things were not easy, but I worked hard.

We both did. And with every success, we celebrated each other. Every failing, we comforted, and celebrated anyway.

I had a lover. A boyfriend. Someone that I could depend on to be there. Someone I didn’t have to worry about. He was dedicated. I was dedicated. No questions. Not that I didn’t have my doubts from time to time… depression like the one I had wasn’t something that could just be whisked away in the heat of passion. Momentarily, perhaps, but it was deeply rooted. But he never gave up on me.

Days went by. We kept it a secret. Notes exchanged, significant glances. Brief, innocent touches in the hallway. We worked together as partners on projects when Aoko-chan (who, bless her heart, supported us every step of the way) would allow it. He acknowledged my presence. He knew me… better than anyone’s ever known me, and he loved me for it. I’ve never felt that before in my life.

It was difficult to rein in the affection. I felt so overwhelmed, at times, with just how much I felt for him… but our secret was important. Our secret kept us alive. Not only to keep enemies away, not just to keep society at bay, but because it added just a little bit of extra spark.  A little bit of intrigue that… was, honestly, just… fun.

There were times when we couldn’t wait until after school to sneak to one of our houses and tear off each other’s clothes. Everything was so new, so vibrant, it was never-ending discovery after amazing discovery and expression of… of all of the things that mattered in life. No; we didn’t make love in the broom closet at school. That would have been unsanitary. But we certainly shared heated kisses. We touched and fondled and explored and towed the line of what we could get away with. I know I got to class after lunch, sometimes, with hair more tousled than Kaito’s. The others wrote it off as my working too hard… but Aoko-chan knew better. Koizumi-san knew better. Hell, if anyone had bothered to pay attention to the red in my cheeks it would have been so obvious but everyone was so used to my being flustered that it didn’t matter!

And getting away with it was so… so fun. So thrilling.

I’d always loved heist movies. I’d always been so interested in the lives and workings of thieves and criminals, the chases, the teasing, the… well. It’s true what they say about the fox. They’re always on the run until they know when they’ve got the advantage. Once they learn your weakness, it’s all over. It’s just fun and games to them. Kaito had me wrapped around his little finger. Still does, in fact. I couldn’t be happier. Though now it’s more of a comfortable routine for us. Not that we don’t have our moments of spontaneity- we certainly do. How could we not, with Kaito being one half of the whole? But those days… young, foolish, reckless…

I’d never been like that before. It was a turning point in my life. I believe that was when the healing really began. And he… he gave that to me. Despite everything, he was willing to give me a chance. Was eager to love me, to take me on as part of his life in an official capacity. He wanted me. All of me. My past, my present, my future.

He’s made my life worth living. He is my reason. My passion. My inspiration.

Kuroba Kaito is, quite honestly, my muse.

And I love him for it.