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Kaito had been carefully watching him since he had sighed. He felt his hands continue to tremble; a clear sign he wasn’t ready to give up his high ground just yet. Cracking his knuckle he moved behind the other and reached over to snagged the unopened bottle of wine. He looked it over just out curiosity and comfort. Looking down at Hakuba again he turned on his heel.

“Can we take this into the parlor? I don’t think either of us can eat ….” He smiled; one full of understanding and apologies.

Hakuba looked at their food, took another deep breath, and nodded. “Yes… I’ll let the staff know; they can wrap it up for us.” He set his napkin on the table and pushed back his chair, getting to his feet gratefully. “And, ah, actually… there’s something that I wanted to give you, so if you don’t mind stopping by my bedroom first… even though it’s a little out of the way…" 

Wait, what was he doing? He bit his lip, dragging the watch from the table and back into his palm, rubbing his thumb over the crest. 

"The parlor does have the billiards table, though. So, after, we can have the wine and… oh, and the flat screen. Perhaps, ah, we can skip right to dessert, then." 

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Kaito felt the pain lance threw his chest and he couldn’t drop his Poker Face to let him see. Taking a deep breath he unsteadily moved to his chair. He couldn’t sit now nor did he want to eat but …

“It wasn’t your fault I … I … reacted. Training.” He tried to smile and failed. He did reach for the wine and knocked all of it back before he had a chance to hesitate he knew if he did he wouldn’t be able to stay. “I …” he coughed. “I’m sorry. You didn’t have to force your self ….you look like your going to puke.”

He managed a timid smile on that the wine hit him in the head.

The detective carefully sighed– carefully, that is, to avoid being sick as Kaito had so bluntly pointed out. For a moment, all that he could do was breathe, hoping that the color in his face would fade quickly.

Hakuba retrieved his pocket watch, then, and set it on the table to look at while he reached for his water glass. “I’ll be all right… and I do understand. There’ve been plenty of situations where…” He hesitated, wincing. “Well, after the Sunset Mansion, I really can’t blame you.”

That entire experience, while not terribly unusual for Hakuba, did nothing to foster trust for others. He often wiped his cups and flatware down when in unfamiliar settings, so long as he could do so discretely. He looked up at Kaito again, biting his lip. Would he sit again?

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As he watched Hakuba try all of the dishes the small bubble of hope came back and he wanted so badly to squash it. He took a tiny hesitant step towards him. A long sigh escaped him. That fear hadn’t quiet gone away and that frustrated him to no end.
“Hakuba …” He whispered quietly. “Stop.”

Swallowing hard, Hakuba set Kaito’s wine glass back on the table and looked over at him, frown fixed on his face. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled, reaching for his napkin again. Leaning back in his chair, shoulders slumping, brows knit. 

“I really didn’t mean to frighten you…" 

God, he wanted to throw up.

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Kaito watched him humiliated, terrified. His stomach rolled dangerously and he launched up and out of his seat. The shaking had moved from his up his arms. Memories from that night flooded back to him all at once. Wrapping arms around his waist he watched the other. His breath came in short quick pants and he felt his vision fade. All thoughts on his escape route vanished.

Please let this be a lie. Don’t …

He bowed his head and struggled with staying right where he was. His imagination was running rapidly around and around. 

“Kuroba-kun…?” Hakuba watched him helplessly, turned in his seat to look at him, half wanting to run to him, half wanting to crawl under the table and die. “There’s no poison, I swear to God. I would never– not to you, not to anyone else, oh God… no, I… I… please forgive me, I…" 

The detective grimaced, turning back to the table to bury his face in his hands. He wanted to eat and show Kaito that things were fine, but as he reached a hand for the fork to force himself, the lump in his throat just pressed harder. "It’s fine, Kuroba-kun, I swear it.” He forced it down, then reached for the soup that was still there, getting a spoonful to eat, as well.

He reached for his wine glass, hesitated, then went for Kaito’s, which he took a long sip from, feeling absolutely miserable. What a mess their dinner had turned into. 

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“That’s fine. I didn’t know that it was a seven hundred dollar bottle of wine. Thank you.” He said and waited before giving the alcohol a swirl not to mix the flavor just to simply do something with his hands. 

He took a sip and welcome the dry heat in the back of his throat. Setting the glass back down he took up the fork and knife again. He was finally starting to relax properly. Glancing over to Hakuba he noticed the other had barely touched his food. He blinked a few times before he glanced down at his food. He swallowed thickly and felt his hands start shaking so bad he places the fork and knife down with a gentle clatter.

“What’s wrong? You’re not eating?” He said quietly and tried to keep the chill out of his voice and expression.

Hakuba blinked, fingers on the stem of his wine glass, glancing down at his food with sudden embarrassment. “Ah, I…” he stammered, wondering exactly how to explain it, turning to offer a pained and apologetic look to Kaito. “Apologies, I just can’t…”

Then he paused. What was wrong with Kuroba? Shaking, fear, the… subtle tremors, what happened? Was it something in the food? The detective looked down at Kaito’s plate, then back to Kaito, alarmed, and then it clicked. 

“Oh! Oh, God! No! Kuroba-kun!” He laughed,bringing a hand to run through his hair anxiously, beside himself and horrified. “God, no I just can’t eat when I’m anxious! I’m so bloody terrified I haven’t been able to – just the water! But it’s…! God!”

Hakuba took a deep breath and hurriedly picked up his fork, with food on it, and forced it down, ears almost scarlet. As he chewed, he wondered if he should feel insulted, bringing up a napkin to cover his mouth as he swallowed, stomach twisting again. “…see?”

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“I’m going to have to talk to your chef. The food is amazing.” He smiled truly. 

He reached for his water glass and noticed his wine bottle unopened. He glanced at the other bottle and shrugged. He couldn’t really take offense after all it was a seven hundred dollar bottle. That price still made him squirm. He finished the water, took up the wine glass and gestured to the open bottle. “Do you mind?”

“I’m so glad to hear that, and… oh! Ah, not at all…”  Hakuba set his own glass down and immediately went for the wine bottle, pouring the exact standard amount into his glass– not a little more or a little less, then set it aside and went for the water pitcher.

“God, I’m sorry. I’m all out of sorts. I hope that you don’t mind that I opted to go with this other bottle… I’d of course be more than willing to drink yours with you, but…”  He laughed uneasily, setting the water pitcher down afterward.

“…I always err on the side of caution, you know.”

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So much for being grounded. Kaito paused in his step and swallowed. “It’s not …. I mean … Can we both admit that this is different and awkward for both of us?” He winced.

Now that the elephant was acknowledge he could breathe a bit better. He walked over to him and rested a hand on the back of Hakuba’s shoulder before taking his seat. He let his finger slide over the material softly before picking up his utensils again and began to eat with vigor. 

“Yes, I believe…”  Hakuba’s voice trailed as Kaito touched his shoulder, gaze following the movement of the other’s hand, even after Kaito went back to eating. “Ah… yes, it’s a little… yes, what you said, precisely.”

He wasn’t usually this bad with communication, even with Kaito. At least, during school he’d managed to keep his composure for the most part, even when frustrated. And during heists, well, that was another matter all together. But here, in this intimate setting, just like the last… It was the one-on-one moments, with no one prying, that were truly the most challenging, and Hakuba was failing to live up to his own expectations.

“I hope the meal is to your liking.” His voice, timid, announced the turn of his head back to his own setting as he reached for the wine he’d poured. 

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That said servant was one he nearly ran into. Embarrassed far beyond he could take he blushed and shook his head. Quickly he moved down the hall and to the guest bathroom, once there he practically showered again. Face dripping the water he struggled to settle his stomach. This wasn’t like him at all. The sickness that came from nerves, the embarrassment at his own stupidity. He was usually so much better than this.  Always one step ahead. What is Hakuba? Did he just not care to put forth an effort.

His hand slid into his hair and he blushed . No, it was because it WAS Hakuba that made everything important. When had the approval of one person mean so much to him? When did Hakuba start to mean so much to him? Exhaling he started to bring a hand to his mouth and paused he was trembling. Glaring he moved it to his churning stomach. He was so nervous and scared and  …. so happy.

Leaned back against the counter he slicked his hair get with the remaining water and took several deep breaths before settling on the fact that he was going to figure this out soon.

Grounded again he walked back to the dinning room.

By the time Kaito returned, another bottle of wine had been brought out. Hakuba really wasn’t certain if they were going to be able to enjoy Kaito’s, so it was better to be safe than sorry. He poured some into his own glass, then sighed, drumming fingers against the table. The moment he heard Kaito’s approaching footsteps, he froze and slowly turned to look at him again, nervous smile plastered on his face.

“Oh, ah… welcome back, Kuroba-kun… I trust you found your way?” A pause. “I’m… so terribly sorry if I’ve mucked everything up. Again. I have to admit that I can be quite awkward at times… ah…”