aries: get a job nerd
taurus: really intimidating and likes plants
gemini: u talk too fast
cancer: cute and probably cries a lot
leo: sexy and definitely cries a lot
virgo: get that stick out of ur ass
libra: satans cousin 3 times removed
scorpio: pretty ok with murder
sagittarius: wow rude
capricorn: *mr krabs voice* money
aquarius: came from the 11th plane of the void
pisces: really excited about birthday parties